Batman: TAS – S1 – Pretty Poison

This review will be written from a different point of view.

Many years ago this place used to be beautiful and by this place I am of course referring to the planet. My ancestors grew out far and wide across the globe but then as human technology “evolved” the areas where my kind survived got smaller and smaller and unsightly things such as roads and building spread like a disease in their place. I will tell you a story of one such incident where humans chose concrete and noise over nature and tranquillity. I will also tell you about the only human who was truly kind to me and her name was Poison.

The year was 1987 and I was growing on some land opposite that monstrosity know as Gotham City but at least my fellow plants and I were far away enough to have some peace. But that all changed thanks to a meat bag called Harvey Dent, I hated him so much and to be honest I still do. Dent and The Mayor of Gotham announced that our piece of land, our home would be dug up and turned into a prison (a place they put humans they can not control). They did not even try to save the plants that lived there. They got their shovels and started to dig us all up. I thought I was a goner until I saw her. She saved me just in time. She put me in a pot and cared for me and she never once forgot to water me. She always talked to me and it felt like she could hear my thoughts, like she could understand me. She told me that she would get revenge for all the plants we lost and that Dent would pay for it with his life. It took five years to put her plan into action but they were five good years.

Pamela (that’s what the humans called her) used her natural charm to gain the attention of Dent. He was so naive thinking that someone like her would care for a murderer like him. Within a week he wanted to marry her. Pam….sorry Poison Ivy as I knew her told me the plan. After she got close to Dent she would use my toxin to kill him. I was so happy with this I allowed Ivy to cut a part of me off so she could make the toxin. Ivy went to dinner with Dent and a friend of his, a man called Bruce Wayne. He was there the day I lost my home. I had hoped after Ivy had dealt with Dent she could take care of Wayne too but alas that wasn’t to be. Ivy told me how easy it was to poison Dent, he basically asked her to do it. She kissed him and he was as good as dead.

After Dent ended up in hospital dying from a kiss from a rose I was surprised to see Ivy go to the hospital to visit him. I felt it was a mistake but she said she didn’t want anyone to get suspicious of her. Unfortunately I believe that Wayne character did. I also believed he told that creature Batman about her. Up until the night he turned up at Ivy’s greenhouse I thought he was just a myth to try and scare humans so they wouldn’t end up in prison.

Batman wanted to capture Ivy and get her to make an antidote for Dent. Why he cared about Dent I’ll never know. For some reason Ivy had already made an antidote which she used as a perfume. Batman was very clumsy and he was nearly eaten by Ivy’s pet Venus Fly-trap. Such a shame he wasn’t. He struggled to break free from the fly-traps vines but somehow he managed it. Ivy tried to kill him with her crossbow but during the fight he knocked over an overhead lamp and that started a fire. Fires are more deadly to plants than humans which is saying a lot. All of Ivy’s work was going up in flames; to say she was annoyed was an understatement. She grabbed me and ran. Batman tackled Ivy but as he did this he nearly fell into a pit of spikes. Lucky for him he was hanging on to the edge of the pit with one arm. Ivy was about to split his head in two with a crossbow bolt but he had an ace up his sleeve well to be more accurate in his other hand, it was me. He held me in his right hand and threatened that would not be falling into the pit alone. He bargained my life with that scumbag Dents. I would of rather died than know that Dent would live but Ivy was too kind, she cared about all plant life so much and I like to believe that she cared about me the most. She dropped the antidote on the floor and grabbed me from Batman. She cradled me in her arms all the way to the same prison that started it all. They is no justice in the world for a Wild Thorny Rose like me.

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